Dream Big

Dream BigThe only place I still feel young and “normal” is in my dreams. This is the best way I feel I can describe my experience with breast cancer as a young woman.

Every morning as I wake up and remember that this has happened to me, I begin my fight against the pain and the sensation of being 85 years old. That is cancer to me.

Speaking of dreams, this morning I dreamt I was riding a bike. And, I think I can say with 100% certainty that I have NEVER dreamt about riding a bike. Even in my subconscious, my brain couldn’t think that was possible. I might dream of childhood friends flying through space while reading a book and talking to pink elephants — that would be normal in a dream. But, me on a bike? It is too far-fetched.

But not last night. I have thought enough about riding Tour de Pink® that I have convinced my subconscious that it’s possible.

And then I woke up … and my body ached and hurt like it does every morning. Thank God cancer has not followed me to my dreams. So … deep breath … some stretching … a positive attitude … and make some coffee. I can do this … and I will!!!

Comments (5)
Categories: Taking my Body Back

5 Responses to Dream Big

  1. Kate McGough says:

    oh how I love you Jen! I can’t even put into words how proud I am of you.

  2. Hi, Jen: Oh, I know what you mean about feeling 85! I’m 4 years out, and my cancer completely changed my flexibility, energy level, everything. My lat flap procedure has also hindered my range of motion.

    People don’t get it.

    Except other BC sisters, that is!

  3. Terri says:

    I love this post because you capture so clearly how cancer can make even the strongest of us feel like a geriatric. I am with you in spirit girl. It feels like yesterday that I came by your office in November to talk about my big hairy audacious dream of traveling around the world to research the idea of creating a foundation to help cancer survivors volunteer internationally. I really appreciated your words of encouragement and it’s hard to believe that I’m already 4 months into my trip around the world. As I finish the final leg, I will keep you and your bike riding dream in my thoughts and prayers. You WILL do it my friend. I have no idea if I would have enough time to train or the capacity to come and join you, but I will be with you in spirit. Big hugs from Peru and keep breathing. xoxo Terri

  4. Julia says:

    I rode a bike and walked through my treatment. Continuing normal exercise—tho’ reduced—helped make me feel sorta normal. Now I’m walking 40 miles in 2-day breast cancer walks. You will be doing the same one day. And each step will be like a prayer.

  5. Robyn26 says:

    I love reading your posts. I am finding a lot of comfort. My best friend was diagnosed stage 4 a few weeks ago. I am passing on all the positive information I can find!! I am reading a book by Judith L. Pearson called, “It’s Just Hair: 20 Essential Life Lessons.” It is a non-fiction self-help book that has really helped me have a better outlook on what is going on. It is filled with humor, something that we don’t have a lot of right now. The life lessons are thought provoking teaching courage, patience, acceptance, stress management and more. http://courageconcepts.com/

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